A Stroll Down Memory Lane
The idea of not being able to dream anymore, to stop dreaming altogether, might seem a bit disconcerting to some folks. For me, the idea of no longer dreaming would be a wish come true.
Before I explain why I wish I could stop having dreams, here is my backstory of dreaming.
I remember, as a preteen, being at full attention and sitting in utter amazement, listening to my younger brother as he recounted his dreams. The reason for my fascination was twofold. First, I found it mind-blowing that my brother was able to control his dreams. Secondly, the fact that he had nightly dreams was even more remarkable.
The palpable excitement, however, was not mutually shared. While I enjoyed listening to my brother’s epic dream adventures, how he used his might to stop monsters in their tracks or fly swiftly and effortlessly to the safety of the air, I had nothing to share with him. I rarely ever dreamed. It’s not that I would forget a dream. I simply did not have dreams.
I’m Dreaming, But I Can’t Fly
It was not until late into my teens that I started having dreams, which happened a few times a month. When I did dream, I could not remember what the dreams entailed.
As a young adult, dreaming became more frequent, though I still had difficulty retrieving the details of my dreams. That pattern continued into my thirties.
My forties have been an entirely different story in that I dream almost nightly and remember nearly every dream in full detail. I still cannot control my dreams. They end when they do.
For example, if I am being chased by a demon or some evil mischief-maker, there are no aerial acrobatics, or shape-shifting, or being endued with supernatural strength and power. Nope, that is not my story. In my dreams, if I am being chased by a monster, I am either killed or eaten.
Make It Stop
Now, here are the reasons I wish I would stop dreaming. First, I have never been able to control my dreams.
Also, the characters in my dreams are usually people with whom I have had past interactions, e.g., former acquaintances, students, co-workers, or childhood friends. I do not want parts of my nights to be filled with dreaming about people, some of whom I do not know if they are dead or alive.
To exacerbate the “characters” dilemma, my dreams often occur in settings that were once part of my former life. For example, I have lots of dreams where I am in a band playing at an event. Well, I was a bassist for many years, but I have not picked up a bass in five years.
In other dreams, I would be in a university classroom having random philosophical conversations with students. Am I the only person who has dreams that revisit a past life? Why would anyone want to dream about activities they no longer participate in?
I Just Wanna Sleep
I feel like dreams are a waste of a good night’s sleep. I’d much rather enjoy the undisturbed darkness of silence and the silence of darkness.
So…how do you feel about what I have shared. Do tell.
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